I fell in love with this man, not too long after becoming his friend. It was easy and happened without me knowing or even trying for it. It's almost as if it, the love, was seeking me. Me- the girl who just wanted to feel wanted. The girl trying to replace the love she never got from a barely existent, now non existent father. The girl who justified being treated like an option because she “saw potential” in the far from worthy men she dated; praying they were “the one” for her.
Anyways, love found me and held me--TIGHT. Told me everything would be ok. And...it was so much more than ok. It was an adventure.
Loving and being loved, finding your person, feels like my favorite time of year. It feels like a warm, not too hot, Summer day in NYC. A day where we should be at work but for some reason, we’re not. Instead we’re heading to our favorite jazz spot or the Coney Island boardwalk. I’m wearing something yellow and short and he’s wearing those denim shorts that show off his bowed legs. It feels like I just got some mangoes, on this same warm summer day, from a street vendor on Jamaica Ave. Then dragging him to the beauty supply store while explaining to him what each product does and why I wish I could find a black owned beauty supply store in my hood.
Loving and being loved, finding your person, feels like deep belly laughs that last so long you get cramps. Soft forehead kisses. A gentle caress from your temple to your chin, then a tilt of your head so your lips meet theirs. It feels like support when you never knew you needed it. Validation when you don’t ask for it. Encouragement when you least expect it.
Loving and being loved, finding your person, feels like the warmest cup of tea on the coldest winter nights. It feels like bundling up in the coziest blanket with a 3 wick scented candle burning that you found on sale at Marshalls. It feels like sitting in silence while you write a blog post and your person does their thing. Sharing the space. Sharing each others presence. Not bothered by the silence but exchanging gentle looks every now and then.
Loving and being loved, finding your person, feels indescribable.
Oh, to be in love-- is an awfully big adventure.
xo
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